Anything that can go wrong...

Had one of those days last week where everything I did - or tried to do - turned out wrong! Been working much more than my normal two days a week to top up the household income while OH is contracting, and on Friday was looking forward to going to a Business Class Corporate lunch in the City. First thing that went wrong that morning was as I got out of the car, I laddered my tights - huge gaping hole that made the damn things very uncomfortable to wear (temps hit nearly 30 that day and couldn't wear my usual 70 denier opaques, had to put on something a bit thinner, couldn't go without as my winter skin is horrid and pale and couldn't inflict those on the world just yet!)

Ok, so leave the office to get to the lunch, stopping at KMart en route for a new pair of tights. End up queuing behind a couple who only had one pair of kids shoes to pay for - should have been in and out of there in minutes, but they wanted to quibble over the price, manager has to be called.... I ended up changing queues but eight minutes of valuable time has been wasted! Pulling back out onto Port Road, I needed to turn right, sat for another five minutes behind white van man who obviously wanted there to be not another car in sight before he pulled out! Finally I gave up, turned left and threw a quick U-ey onto Port Road...... only to find road blocked by jack-knifed lorry! Arrrggghhh... now have just 20 minutes to get into City! What should have been a quick diversion was slllloooowwww as ended up stuck behind some tourist driver who obviously doesn't know the back roads (more arrggghh), finally end up on Port Road, heading for the City. Making fairly good time when I get a call from the colleague I'm meeting there saying the car park opposite hotel is full, suggesting turning in at the Casino and parking in that one instead. Did this. Parked. Now dead on the time I should be there. No worries, just need to cross the road.

Come out of wrong door of carpark, end up by the river, can't find my way out to North Terrace. End up (in heels, still with hole in tights as not had chance to put new ones on) walking what seems like miles, ending up on bridge OVER North Terrace (with no bloody parachute when I need one!) Ten minutes to find my way back to the bit of North Terrace I need, giving up on finding hotel, finally ask passer by - he points to the building we're almost outside of, looking at me like I'm total idiot!

Hot, sweaty, late - rush in, grab seat, slowly manage to relax over nice meal and speeches (some better than others!) - do the 'networking' thing and recognise a neighbour and friend there. Find out he came in by bus and offer him a lift home. All good.

Walk across road to car park with said neighbour/friend.... spend next fifteen minutes searching for my car! Getting really embarrassed now - he's too nice to say anything, but keeps sending surreptitious texts (can imagine what they say "stranded in underground car park with complete ditz, home in 20 minutes"..... "still looking for car, make that 30 minutes"..... "still looking for her car, maybe 40 minutes"....) Why are so many cars in Adelaide silver? Why don't I have one of those keyrings that makes the car beep at you from a distance? Why do all floors on a car park look the same?

Finally realise we're in the wrong car park!!!!! Manage to find way out of there, and into another one, and thank god, there's the car. Thank you God! Poor guy must now think - with good cause I admit - that I am total and utter dizzy hopeless bint! Instead of a 20 minute bus ride home, it's taken him nearly 30 minutes just to get into the car! He's the parent of one of daughter's best friends - never again can I call her a dizzy blonde - or if I do, he's going to straight away know where she gets it from! I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole! Must have hurt his ears with my embarrassed chatter all the way home! Why can't I just shut up?

What a total bloody disaster!!!! Shouldn't have ever got out of bed!!